Contact / Family Time Between the Child, their Family and Other Significant People in the child’s life
Standards and Regulations
Fostering Services National Minimum Standards (England) 2011:
- Standard 1 - The child’s wishes and feelings and those significant to them.
- Standard 9 - Promoting and supporting contact.
Training, Support and Development Standards for Foster Care:
Related guidance
When talking about the time a child spends with their family, we need to be really careful in thinking about the language we are using. This is referred to as contact in this document, but others prefer the term 'family time' or 'time together'. You should use the language that the child is comfortable with.
For many children, relationships with family members, previous carers, friends and others are valued. Contact/ family time is very important in helping children develop their sense of identity and understand their lives.
Research says that maintaining links between a child and their family increases the possibility of them returning to their family home.
Contact/ family time with family and friends will be agreed in the Care Plan, or Pathway Plan as well as in the Placement Plan. This will detail where, when and how contact / family time will take place including whether it will be supervised. It may take place in the foster home or somewhere else depending on the child’s needs. As a foster carer you will be supported to help children to have appropriate and carefully assessed time (direct and/or indirect) with their family, friends and other people who are important to them, such as previous carers.
The child’s social worker will provide you with the necessary information including any assessment of risk for those involved. The child’s welfare is the paramount consideration at all times. The needs, wishes and feelings of the child are also important when planning contact/ family time, and should be observed and recorded. This may involve using the child’s network such as school or other ways to understand the child’s views. It may be useful to find out how the child placed with you communicates with others (this may include mobile phones or other social networking sites and apps and consoles such as Xbox or PlayStation) so that this can be taken into consideration and an agreement reached about how safely to do this (see: Internet, Photographs and Mobile Phones).
Contact/family time should be focused on, and shaped around, the child’s needs.
The East Sussex Fostering Service through your Supervising Social Worker will give you practical advice and support.
Face to face meetings and visits will generally be the best way of maintaining relationships, but other means such as letters, phone calls, photograph exchanges, cards can also be helpful for the child.
You should also talk to the child's social worker to explore how electronic communication, such as video calls, can support positive relationships for children. Children should be supported to ensure they are safe online rather than this form of contact being avoided. Childnet have produced some helpful information to help foster carers consider contact with a child/young person's family through the use of social media and digital devices. Link tour ES Dig information.
It is important that children from different background to you and your family, maintain their links with their family, friends and community so that their cultural history is encouraged, developed and valued.
It is not unusual for children to ask to have time with relatives or friends they may have lost touch with before becoming Looked After. If this happens speak to the child’s social worker.
You should record the behaviour and reaction of the child before and after contact / family time. This may identify patterns which can contribute to future decision making.
If you have any questions or concerns you can discuss these in your supervision meeting with your Supervising Social Worker.
Contact/family time can increase a child’s sense of security when the people who are important to them are comfortable with each other. This can also help parents and other family members to feel less awkward and threatened.
The child may be allowed to visit their birth parents at home. These visits, which may include staying overnight, must be planned in advance, with the child’s social worker.
Sometimes the child may appear anxious and upset by a visit. This may be because the visits:
- Remind them of feelings of loss and separation;
- Remind them of feelings about past experiences;
- Highlight feelings of divided loyalties.
If you have any concerns at all you must speak to the child’s social worker and supervising social worker.
Working with birth parents is an important part of fostering. A vital element of this is trust and confidentiality.
In sharing the care of a child, you will receive a lot of confidential information which you may wish to share with those closest to you. Please discuss this with the child’s Social Worker in the first instance.
You may also talk to other carers about children you are caring for perhaps in general or to seek support. You should remember to treat any discussions in confidence and children should never be specifically identified or named.
It can cause distress and upset for a child/young person, and you are often the person who has to manage this when a child feels confused, angry or disappointed. You may also have mixed emotions when this happens. There is helpful training and support groups to attend to support you with your feelings.
You may have conflicting feelings about the arrangements and feel that their family is letting them down, but there could be many reasons for this.
- The family may feel guilty or angry that their child is in foster care and are not able to separate this from the time they have with the child;
- A child may have been placed in an emergency when the family was experiencing problems;
- Parents or family members may feel angry that their children are living with you if this is against their wishes and resent having to comply with plans they don’t agree with to see their child;
- Parents or family members can also worry that you will take their place in the child’s life and may have heard in the media about foster carers wanting to adopt fostered children;
- Parents or family members may also feel they have let their child down which can impact on their motivation and reliability.
These reasons and feelings can lead to parents or family members behaving in ways which appear inappropriate. They may be very emotional, give the children unrealistic messages or make promises they can not keep.
Any restrictions on communication by the child with their parents should be agreed by the child’s social worker and reviewed alongside the child’s wishes and feelings.
If you feel that changes should be made to contact/ family time arrangements to protect the child from significant harm the child’s social worker should be told immediately or within 24 hours. If the child returns from contact/ family time and you are concerned in any way about something that has been said or done, particularly if you think it has harmed the child in anyway, you must report this to the child’s social worker or a duty worker out of hoursin their office immediately or within 24 hours.
Foster carers are required to attend mandatory training on supporting contact/family time every 3 years. There is also an additional e-learning course available.
Last Updated: September 30, 2024
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